I wish I could take it at face value that the time change in the Fall always throws me off balance, but I resist its effect on me every time. As you know, what we resist–persists.
I don’t know how one little hour can disorient me so much, but it does. Staying with my recent theme of surrender, I am not going to sit here and tell you how to avoid seasonal depression from happening. I think the answer to that would be to stop changing our clocks every time we get a nice rhythm going! But since we can’t control that…
Here are all of the things I do when the days get shorter and my serotonin levels seem to go down with the sun:
The basics:
Depression is not just mental, it’s also physical. Be sure to include your physical health when you are trying to take care of your mental health.
Walk: I would love it if I could get a quality workout in every morning, but when my circadian rhythm gets thrown off, sometimes attempting what I consider a “true workout” can do more harm than good. If you are really tired or feeling depleted–an intense work out could worsen your fatigue or lead to an injury. Walkers, unite! Walking is still a form of exercise and (in my opinion) it is the most underrated form of exercise to boost your mood. It’s accessible, it can be as mindless or mindful as you want it to be. All you have to do is step outside your door or onto a walking pad in front of an open window, and your body will thank you. You’ll sleep better too.
Greens: Greens are brain food. Greens are nutrient dense and slow cognitive decline. I never thought I would learn to enjoy greens, but I’m at a point where my appreciation for what they do overrides my dislike for the taste.
Breakfast of champions: Scrambled eggs with a little feta cheese, and a handful of spinach. Don’t skip meals just because you feel behind now that the sun is up earlier. You still need to fuel!
Medication (if applicable): If you know that what you are experiencing is beyond what any walk or nutrition can do for you or if even going for a walk sounds like a hill you cannot climb–you might consider meeting with a psychiatrist to discuss medication. Many psychiatrists book out for a month or more so if you know that this is something you have put off for a while–I would encourage you to take action now. If you are already on medication, this might just serve as your reminder that it is ok to need it and to continue taking it if it is helping you.
Rest, and whatever it takes to catch up on sleep: I think we’re starting to normalize now, but my house has been a circus in the nighttime for the past week. Everyone is falling asleep early, but everyone is also waking up very, very early. Nap if you can. If you can’t nap–allow yourself to lay flat on your back and reset your vagus nerve.
Also, in case you need some reassurance, it is ok to utilize whatever sleep arrangements you need to for the time being. While consistency is important, I also think survival wins in that department. If you and your partner end up needing to sleep in separate rooms or co-sleeping with kids–just make sure you are intentional about cuddling or being affectionate with each other at some other point in the day.
Grace: No matter what we expect of ourselves, our bodies will tell the real story of how we are adjusting. It is ok if you are having a hard time adjusting to the time change or to shorter days. Changing seasons can also bring up a lot of grief. See if you can expand to allow for that rather than tensing and trying to bypass it.
Read or Listen to the Bible: We are not meant to live on bread alone! The Bible is truly food for our soul. I’ve gone through many hormonal rollercoasters over the past year with two pregnancies, birth/postpartum, and now breastfeeding. Reading the Bible has become my lifeline, and not just for myself–it also calms my daughter and son better than any other story. We are meant to experience rest when we are in God’s word. When I am restless or woken up and cannot go back to sleep–I read the Bible. It is so rare that it doesn’t put me back to sleep. Honestly, I think if sleep experts recognized how effective it is they might be out of business.
AM and PM anchors: When your days feel turned upside down or you are having a hard time acclimating to a new season, establishing a whole new routine takes time. Sometimes it helps to pick one anchor instead. What’s one thing you can do at the start of every morning and at the end of every evening that helps you feel rooted? Keep in mind, you do not have to keep these anchors the same forever and ever! It’s just for the next few months, or until the next transition. Lately, this devotional has been our favorite way to start each morning.
Ok, now onto more fun “hacks”:
Christmas lights!!! All the Christmas lights, but particularly the ones that illuminate any area where you can sit and read or journal in the evenings or in the early AM.
Anything that makes your home cozy. Get out your favorite blankets and pajamas.This is not an ad, but I’ve been buying those expensive (and way too tight) matching pajamas for years and we almost never even take a picture in them. I recently bought these pajamas from Gap, and they are the best!! Truly the most comfortable pajamas I own. As my daughter says, “they’re not too scratchy!”
Make plans you are looking forward to, not just plans you need to make. Think about the people you want to see, the places you want to go, anything festive that sounds fun to you, or even block off time that will be just for a staycation. Research has shown that the effects of making plans you are excited about extend beyond the plans themselves. They boost your mood leading up to that time, and they are something you can enjoy later as you reflect on them.
Sun lamps. Similar to Christmas lights, but somehow different. I personally have not found one that I love yet (sensitive eyes), but I have known people that swear by them and I have had clients report back that they work.
Baking. I’m not sure my daughter actually likes to eat banana bread, but she loves making it with me and that alone is a mood boost for me. I’m not much of a baker, but I have found you only need a couple of “real” recipes for people to think you are and for people to enjoy your talents :).
Crafts. Again, not so much about the result but about the joy of making something. You do not have to be an Etsy seller with a side hustle that makes X amount of money for you to prioritize something crafty. Allow yourself to get lost in creativity!
The bottom line is allowing yourself or making room to embrace the changes that come with a new season.
There’s an account on Instagram I have followed for a while that I think does an excellent job of sharing honestly and vulnerably about her journey through depression and depression recovery. She said something today that I thought was really brilliant–
The trick of getting through seasonal depression is to lean into the season, not to fight it. Try not to spend too much time wishing it wasn’t winter. Instead, figure out how you can find the joy in what is. Try not to escape, but to find a way through.
Find the things you like about winter, and embrace them as much as you can.
When I think about why I really don’t want it to be November yet, it’s actually not about the weather or the stress of the holidays at all. It’s the passage of time. Kids grow so fast, and it can feel really unfair that time doesn’t slow down during the periods you are really enjoying.
So, saying this as much for myself as I am for you–embracing this season might mean giving yourself some time to look backwards and shed a few tears as you clean out the clothes that no longer fit.
It might mean giving yourself a pat on the back for how far you’ve come rather than beating yourself up about what you haven’t done yet.
And if any of this stirs up some feelings for you that you would like to explore with someone–please reach out.
While this time of year can be exciting and busy, it can also be very stressful and lonely for reasons that can be hard to put into words. Therapy is a great place to experience some compassion and empathy for what you are walking through and to develop a language for the feelings that need some light.
Moving Forward with Emotional Honesty
Learning to validate your emotions is a practice, not a perfection. Start small. Notice one feeling today without trying to change it. Tell God about one emotional experience you’ve been avoiding. Ask one trusted person to listen as you process something you’re feeling.
Remember: God isn’t waiting for you to get your emotions “right” before He loves you. He loves you in your anger, in your sadness, in your fear, and in your joy. Emotional validation is simply learning to love yourself—and others—with the same acceptance.
If you’re in the Georgetown, Round Rock, or Central Texas area and struggling with emotional overwhelm, spiritual disconnection, or relationship challenges, faith-focused therapy can provide the safe space you need to explore these patterns with both clinical wisdom and spiritual understanding. You don’t have to navigate these waters alone.
About the Author: Alex Barnette, LMFT, is a licensed marriage and family therapist providing virtual Christian counseling to individuals and couples throughout Texas. She specializes in helping people integrate emotional health with spiritual growth, creating space for both healing and faith to flourish.
